I was in Chicago last week for the annual shareholder meeting of my employer. I oversee the execution of the meeting with the capable, professional help of staff and a production company that arranges for the set, lighting, visual productions, etc. My friend and colleague Bill is an owner of the production company. Bill is 75 and not even considering slowing down, let alone retiring. I consider Bill family. As such, I've been praying for, and a few times with, him for many years. Bill is a skeptic when it comes to religion -- and for some good reasons. I simply want him to know truth; the most fundamental truth of who Jesus was, is, and always will be. I want Bill in heaven with me.
We've had some good conversations over the years, but there's always a stiff-arm to the idea of accepting such a "crazy" idea. Bill is a self-made, self-sufficient man. They (as I personally know well!) are the toughest to bring to an understanding of their own need and the provision God offers.
So, I pray, and I try to model God's character to Bill.
But last week, an open door came in a remarkable way. Stay with me on this one...
Bill was getting his shoes shined in the hotel. As Bill often does with strangers, he had made fast friends with the shoe shine man. As I came down the hall, Bill hollered, "Ann, Ann, you have to meet Jason."
I headed over to the shoe shine stand and Bill introduced me to Jason, a former Marine (I guess you're always a Marine, right?) who coaches a youth track team, writes poetry, and shines shoes in the Hilton Chicago.
Now, I hate to admit this, but I would have never bothered to meet Jason had Bill not flagged me down. I would have walked right by him dozens of times during the week. But this "chance encounter" was prearranged.
You see, as we discussed Jason's desire to help kids, he quoted Scripture. I answered, "Amen, brother." We made eye contact in acknowledgment of our shared commitment to the Lord.
Jason then proceeded to share a poem with me. His poem was titled, "Who am I?" It was a beautiful summary of Jesus' birth, death, and resurrection. It was the gospel as "in your face" as it gets -- all of this with Bill still on the shoe shine stand.
While Jason spoke, I prayed for Bill to have open ears and an open heart.
I don't know if Bill took the message to heart, but I do know it was spoken more directly and beautifully than any conversation I might have tried to orchestrate.
Days later, Brad and I were headed out to dinner and Jason was at his stand. I walked over and asked him if he remembered Bill. He did. I told him of the years I've prayed, and I thanked him for his boldness in powerfully delivering the good news. Jason's eyes, and mine, filled with tears as he thanked me for letting him know.
In a week that involved reporting billions of dollars in sales, eating like royalty, staying in opulent "digs," taking in top-notch entertainment, and glad-handing with nearly 1,000 meeting guests, it was the encounter with Jason, a man not at all defined by his occupation, that will stay with me...and, I pray, will stay with Bill.
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Taking Inventory
I've agreed to a preaching assignment in November that's titled: "If you knew my past..."
It sounded like a wonderful challenge when I agreed. I do find that there is great impact in being real and sharing what God's done in my life. But as I sat down to list out "What I want 'you' to know I am" and "What I'd much prefer 'you' never knew" a formerly familiar feeling crept into my heart and mind... Shame.
Shame, in the Bible, is used to point to guilt. And, clearly, I'm guilty of many failures that have hurt God's heart. Still, that fact of being guilty and the FEELING of shame are two different things entirely.
You see, God forgives, redeems, frees, and makes new. Having confessed my failures and accepted His gift of grace, I am free from the guilt and the feelings of condemnation. So why now? Why is the shame monster attacking me?
The evil one, Satan, doesn't like stories of redemption and will bring his full-on effort to tell you (me) that: "Those things you did are really who you are. You are a fake -- your real character is scum -- no one will respect you anymore if you share the truth. If they know your past...they will reject, leave, loathe, look down on, or pity you."
Oh, yes... Isn't that the point of the sermon in the first place? Defeating the lies and ushering in God's Truth and light on who I am in him is what offers hope.
So, into the battle I go! Who's with me?
It sounded like a wonderful challenge when I agreed. I do find that there is great impact in being real and sharing what God's done in my life. But as I sat down to list out "What I want 'you' to know I am" and "What I'd much prefer 'you' never knew" a formerly familiar feeling crept into my heart and mind... Shame.
Shame, in the Bible, is used to point to guilt. And, clearly, I'm guilty of many failures that have hurt God's heart. Still, that fact of being guilty and the FEELING of shame are two different things entirely.
You see, God forgives, redeems, frees, and makes new. Having confessed my failures and accepted His gift of grace, I am free from the guilt and the feelings of condemnation. So why now? Why is the shame monster attacking me?
The evil one, Satan, doesn't like stories of redemption and will bring his full-on effort to tell you (me) that: "Those things you did are really who you are. You are a fake -- your real character is scum -- no one will respect you anymore if you share the truth. If they know your past...they will reject, leave, loathe, look down on, or pity you."
Oh, yes... Isn't that the point of the sermon in the first place? Defeating the lies and ushering in God's Truth and light on who I am in him is what offers hope.
So, into the battle I go! Who's with me?
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
My Friend Jerry - Part 4
Back to my friend Jeremiah the Old Testament prophet...
Jerry’s life makes for a good story.
His character adds depth to the story.
But the whole story of my friend Jerry is more about God than Jeremiah’s life or his character.
Every story in the Bible is about God. He is the hero of each one. His life and his character are what matters.
Jerry’s God, the only God, desires a personal relationship with each of his children.
God brings exile for a purpose -- to ask for our obedience. He tells the people of Israel, through Jeremiah, to make the best of what they have. He asks them to plant gardens, build homes, marry, and have children while in exile. That goes against our mindset of waiting until our circumstances change before investing in the “good stuff” of life. While Jerry was in prison, God told him to buy a field in enemy territory. It made no sense to anybody else. But God was making a point: "This will be your home again, sometime. Invest in your life now -- where you are at -- up against everything you are up against.
Do you hear that? Invest what you have now!
It get’s REALLY personal at this point. Aren't we all are holding back something or hiding in some way from God and from someone we know we should engage more fully?
*God himself, like Jeremiah, endured humiliation
(Phil 2:5-11 - the sacrifice and the resurrection power)
*God is our hope… Jesus’ sacrifice and resurrection!
Jerry’s story, like every human’s in the Bible, simply points us to Jesus and our need for him.
*God is with us
Jer 29:12-13:
"Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."
Jer 31:3-4:
"The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness. I will build you up again and you will be rebuilt... Again you will take up your tambourines and go out to dance with the joyful."
God is with us!
Jeremiah later prays about all that he is thankful for, and he makes the point that nothing is too hard for God.
Nothing is too hard for God -- even sending his son to earth to live and die for us -- each of us. Talk about loneliness! Can you even imagine that moment when Jesus cries out to Father God, “Why have you forsaken me?” and God -- for the sake of each of us -- must allow his son to die.
Nothing is too hard for God. Not even your loneliness. That’s why Jesus came, endured humiliation, and made the sacrifice he did.
Exile of Israel more than 2,500 years ago, my personal exile, your exiled times -- all of it is part of God’s biggest story of victory. He is all about creating and re-creating (God creates, God judges evil, God saves and restores, and God re-creates).
We can endure suffering with God’s grace. God redeems suffering through grace -- that’s Jesus’ story and the only one that matters.
God promised Jeremiah repeatedly -- “I am with you. I will rescue you. I will not let you fail or be overcome by your enemies.”
He means that!
There is no storybook happy ending for Jeremiah, but his life was lived fully. It was rich. He knew God deeply. He honored God and was honored by God. His was a story worth telling and worth living.
But what if you are stuck in a lonely, muddy pit today?
God wants to hear your heart cry -- your story. He wants to use and transform your hardships and heartaches.
Jerry’s life makes for a good story.
His character adds depth to the story.
But the whole story of my friend Jerry is more about God than Jeremiah’s life or his character.
Every story in the Bible is about God. He is the hero of each one. His life and his character are what matters.
Jerry’s God, the only God, desires a personal relationship with each of his children.
God brings exile for a purpose -- to ask for our obedience. He tells the people of Israel, through Jeremiah, to make the best of what they have. He asks them to plant gardens, build homes, marry, and have children while in exile. That goes against our mindset of waiting until our circumstances change before investing in the “good stuff” of life. While Jerry was in prison, God told him to buy a field in enemy territory. It made no sense to anybody else. But God was making a point: "This will be your home again, sometime. Invest in your life now -- where you are at -- up against everything you are up against.
Do you hear that? Invest what you have now!
It get’s REALLY personal at this point. Aren't we all are holding back something or hiding in some way from God and from someone we know we should engage more fully?
*God himself, like Jeremiah, endured humiliation
(Phil 2:5-11 - the sacrifice and the resurrection power)
*God is our hope… Jesus’ sacrifice and resurrection!
Jerry’s story, like every human’s in the Bible, simply points us to Jesus and our need for him.
*God is with us
Jer 29:12-13:
"Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."
Jer 31:3-4:
"The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness. I will build you up again and you will be rebuilt... Again you will take up your tambourines and go out to dance with the joyful."
God is with us!
Jeremiah later prays about all that he is thankful for, and he makes the point that nothing is too hard for God.
Nothing is too hard for God -- even sending his son to earth to live and die for us -- each of us. Talk about loneliness! Can you even imagine that moment when Jesus cries out to Father God, “Why have you forsaken me?” and God -- for the sake of each of us -- must allow his son to die.
Nothing is too hard for God. Not even your loneliness. That’s why Jesus came, endured humiliation, and made the sacrifice he did.
Exile of Israel more than 2,500 years ago, my personal exile, your exiled times -- all of it is part of God’s biggest story of victory. He is all about creating and re-creating (God creates, God judges evil, God saves and restores, and God re-creates).
We can endure suffering with God’s grace. God redeems suffering through grace -- that’s Jesus’ story and the only one that matters.
God promised Jeremiah repeatedly -- “I am with you. I will rescue you. I will not let you fail or be overcome by your enemies.”
He means that!
There is no storybook happy ending for Jeremiah, but his life was lived fully. It was rich. He knew God deeply. He honored God and was honored by God. His was a story worth telling and worth living.
But what if you are stuck in a lonely, muddy pit today?
God wants to hear your heart cry -- your story. He wants to use and transform your hardships and heartaches.
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
The Circle of Life
Thank you for your prayers! I felt them mightily, and God granted me composure to lead Molly's service. There were 800+ in attendance, some 150 of whom stood for the 70 minute program. Molly would have loved a standing room only crowd to hear about Jesus. And they did!
She was remembered with laughter and tears by dear friends and family -- several of whom witnessed to her faith. I was honored to deliver the gospel message to the crowd in what I pray was a simple, concise, and personal way. Later, a woman came up to me and said, "I can't believe you were bold enough to just lay out the gospel in a public university building."
I must say, it hadn't occurred to me that it might be an issue for some. Oh well! Thank you, God, that I don't worry about such things.
As the service ended, it was sad to notice that we never get all our "peeps" in the same room until our funeral. I met so many awesome women who were also Molly's friends -- and her sister, brothers, and nieces were so very welcoming of me as family. It's hard to know that few of the "we have to get together again" and "we need to have lunch" comments/intentions will likely come to pass.
In a way, a circle is broken, because Molly had been the hub.
On the other hand, it was so cool to see Molly's daughter Haley with her friends after the service. Haley was in the middle of a circle of girls -- laughing. A new circle formed...
My friend Jeff reminded me that heaven is the big, unbroken circle with enough time to connect with everyone. Glimpses here. Reality there.
'til then, Molly, goodbye!
Monday, August 9, 2010
Call of Duty
Heartland Community Church's pastor, Roger, is at his mother's 90th birthday party today in West Texas. Ruth is a twin, and she and her sister get to celebrate 90 years of sisterhood with family. As it should be...
That means, however, that Roger is not in town to perform Molly's "celebration of life" service today. I will do so at 3 p.m. in a ballroom on the Illinois State University campus. I'm honored to be asked. I desired to be involved. I do beleive I'm called to minister in a public way. And...I'm scared. Not of the crowd or the speaking and handling of program elements, but of the unexpected nature of grief -- my grief.
If there is one thing I've learned about grief over the years, it's that you don't control or predict what it will do. It comes in waves that you can't always see approaching. Sometimes you ride them well. Sometimes you get swallowed and swirled around in the sand, seaweed, and saltwater.
My desire is to be poised and a stablizing force for Molly's family. But I also know I don't have complete control over that. Funny, isn't it, that surrendering control is a big point in today's message to those who will gather.
So, I pray and ask God to use it all -- my words, my preparation, my intentions, and my grief to bring Him glory and honor as we all say "see you soon" to Molly.
That means, however, that Roger is not in town to perform Molly's "celebration of life" service today. I will do so at 3 p.m. in a ballroom on the Illinois State University campus. I'm honored to be asked. I desired to be involved. I do beleive I'm called to minister in a public way. And...I'm scared. Not of the crowd or the speaking and handling of program elements, but of the unexpected nature of grief -- my grief.
If there is one thing I've learned about grief over the years, it's that you don't control or predict what it will do. It comes in waves that you can't always see approaching. Sometimes you ride them well. Sometimes you get swallowed and swirled around in the sand, seaweed, and saltwater.
My desire is to be poised and a stablizing force for Molly's family. But I also know I don't have complete control over that. Funny, isn't it, that surrendering control is a big point in today's message to those who will gather.
So, I pray and ask God to use it all -- my words, my preparation, my intentions, and my grief to bring Him glory and honor as we all say "see you soon" to Molly.
Thursday, August 5, 2010
No More Pain
Revelation 21:4:"He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away."
Molly met Jesus face-to-face yesterday afternoon. I'm thrilled for her -- sad for me and all who love her.
Cancer had attacked her strong, beautiful body and broke it down until she could no longer sustaintain life here on earth. But today, and for all eternity, she will have no more pain because of her relationship with her Savior who paid the price to overcome death.
Molly didn't worry about herself much, but she did have concerns about her family and how they would get along without her. Molly was one of those "superwomen" I identify with so well. She worked hard to earn a good living, took care of her family's needs, kept up with friends, planned schedules, balanced issues -- all bobbing and weaving like a pro.
But Molly had learned that she didn't have control over the world (like we "superwomen" would prefer). She learned to love and live in the moment. Her example will stay with me.
I'm numb today. I was so glad to spend time with her last weekend. Now I'd give anything for one more visit.
Someday, we'll meet again. In the meantime, I pray I can take a page from her book and learn that it's not what we do -- but who we are -- that matters.
Molly met Jesus face-to-face yesterday afternoon. I'm thrilled for her -- sad for me and all who love her.
Cancer had attacked her strong, beautiful body and broke it down until she could no longer sustaintain life here on earth. But today, and for all eternity, she will have no more pain because of her relationship with her Savior who paid the price to overcome death.
Molly didn't worry about herself much, but she did have concerns about her family and how they would get along without her. Molly was one of those "superwomen" I identify with so well. She worked hard to earn a good living, took care of her family's needs, kept up with friends, planned schedules, balanced issues -- all bobbing and weaving like a pro.
But Molly had learned that she didn't have control over the world (like we "superwomen" would prefer). She learned to love and live in the moment. Her example will stay with me.
I'm numb today. I was so glad to spend time with her last weekend. Now I'd give anything for one more visit.
Someday, we'll meet again. In the meantime, I pray I can take a page from her book and learn that it's not what we do -- but who we are -- that matters.
Monday, August 2, 2010
Honoring Molly
From Psalm 84
1 How lovely is your dwelling place,
O LORD Almighty!
2 My soul yearns, even faints,
for the courts of the LORD;
my heart and my flesh cry out
for the living God.
3 Even the sparrow has found a home,
and the swallow a nest for herself,
where she may have her young—
a place near your altar,
O LORD Almighty, my King and my God.
4 Blessed are those who dwell in your house;
they are ever praising you.
5 Blessed are those whose strength is in you,
who have set their hearts on pilgrimage.
6 As they pass through the Valley of Baca,
they make it a place of springs;
the autumn rains also cover it with pools.
7 They go from strength to strength,
'til each appears before God in Zion...
Molly is still among us today. I want to write this tribute before she leaves us.
As the Psalm says, our hearts yearn for God's dwelling place -- for home.
Molly spent her days on earth in quest of creating and finding "home."
As a wife and mom, her strength in establishing home base for her family was abundantly evident. It was job one. A welcoming haven for kids, dogs, friends, and family, she made. It will endure.
As director of admissions for Illinois State University, Molly made a home for students, investing in them personally, choosing to be an advocate for those who needed one. It's funny, but when anyone first met Molly, she would say, "Oh, I work in admissions at ISU." Her humility was a part of what made ISU home for many, including my own niece.
As a Christ-follower, Molly came to find her church home at Heartland Community Church in Normal, Ill. Building from the foundations of her faith throughout her life, I was blessed to witness Molly engage a deep, personal, and joyful relationship with Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior -- and with Heartlanders (like me) who became "family." I experienced her passion for God's word -- for Truth.
As a child of God, Molly yearned for her eternal home, but struggled with leaving those she loved behind. We struggle with letting her go. But she is going home. Her homemaking on earth is about to be complete. Well done, Molly!
Molly is as strong of a person as I've known. So I repeat from Psalm 84:
...Blessed are those whose strength is in you, who have set their hearts on pilgrimage. As they pass through the Valley of Baca, they make it a place of springs; the autumn rains also cover it with pools. They go from strength to strength, 'til each appears before God in Zion...
Go in peace, Miss Molly.
1 How lovely is your dwelling place,
O LORD Almighty!
2 My soul yearns, even faints,
for the courts of the LORD;
my heart and my flesh cry out
for the living God.
3 Even the sparrow has found a home,
and the swallow a nest for herself,
where she may have her young—
a place near your altar,
O LORD Almighty, my King and my God.
4 Blessed are those who dwell in your house;
they are ever praising you.
5 Blessed are those whose strength is in you,
who have set their hearts on pilgrimage.
6 As they pass through the Valley of Baca,
they make it a place of springs;
the autumn rains also cover it with pools.
7 They go from strength to strength,
'til each appears before God in Zion...
Molly is still among us today. I want to write this tribute before she leaves us.
As the Psalm says, our hearts yearn for God's dwelling place -- for home.
Molly spent her days on earth in quest of creating and finding "home."
As a wife and mom, her strength in establishing home base for her family was abundantly evident. It was job one. A welcoming haven for kids, dogs, friends, and family, she made. It will endure.
As director of admissions for Illinois State University, Molly made a home for students, investing in them personally, choosing to be an advocate for those who needed one. It's funny, but when anyone first met Molly, she would say, "Oh, I work in admissions at ISU." Her humility was a part of what made ISU home for many, including my own niece.
As a Christ-follower, Molly came to find her church home at Heartland Community Church in Normal, Ill. Building from the foundations of her faith throughout her life, I was blessed to witness Molly engage a deep, personal, and joyful relationship with Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior -- and with Heartlanders (like me) who became "family." I experienced her passion for God's word -- for Truth.
As a child of God, Molly yearned for her eternal home, but struggled with leaving those she loved behind. We struggle with letting her go. But she is going home. Her homemaking on earth is about to be complete. Well done, Molly!
Molly is as strong of a person as I've known. So I repeat from Psalm 84:
...Blessed are those whose strength is in you, who have set their hearts on pilgrimage. As they pass through the Valley of Baca, they make it a place of springs; the autumn rains also cover it with pools. They go from strength to strength, 'til each appears before God in Zion...
Go in peace, Miss Molly.
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